Friday, July 31, 2009

...

I miss you, so much!
The past three days my mind has been unable to think about anything else.
I guess we really only do realise how much we love/want something when there's a possibility that we won't be able to have it.

Thursday, July 30, 2009

Say what you mean, and mean what you say.

It really came to the surface for me today that i desire depth in people. I enjoy complexity and how it makes someone unique.
People that are too indifferent bore and disappoint me, and i don't understand how they can show little to no interest in opinions or events that i would definitely show some form of interest in.

I've also realised how much i want to be wanted. If i'm not given affection (of some form) in a given time i tend to feel somewhat neglected and unhappy. I suppose this goes hand in hand with indifferent people. If they appear uninterested in me i feel reluctant to show them affection.

Argh right now i'm not too content. At all.
Just love me, and care about the little special things that i care about.
You are too indifferent. :(

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

.ju bm l.ed

Sometimes i get so caught up in the way people act/react in particular situations while moulding my opinion of them that i become unable to differentiate between whether people are acting how they would act regardless of the variables, or whether they are trying to act/react how they perceive that i would like them to.
This is something that i think everyone subconciously does day in day out, myself included. We act the way that we think we should, we follow social norms, possibly act to impress...etcetera
The problem with this is that it gives false impressions of who we are. Sure it may make you well liked for a period of time by a particular person, but in the long run, i think we end up at square one. Back to our normal self. The normal actions and reactions that we would undertake regardless of the variable, simply because a false act is too hard to maintain. And we end up disappointing others, followed by ourselves. Yet we put ourselves through it all the time.


I'm sorry for the jumbled thoughs, they came out of nowhere.

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

Typical Tamara Campbell,

"and i'm in love with how you feel"

Sunday, July 19, 2009

spontaneous emotion

my boyfriend really has me wrapped around his little finger as of late, and i'm loving every moment of it. I don't think he even realises how much he occupies my mind when i'm not with him, and how much i love being with him.
The feelings that i'm feeling currently make me so happy that any possible negative situations or outcomes seem well worth the risk. In saying that though, i never want these feelings to go. I don't want him going anywhere any time soon.
MY BOYFRIEND REALLY IS AMAZING! I'M SORRY THAT HE IS THE ONLY MAIN TOPIC ON MY MIND AT THE MOMENT.

Friday, July 17, 2009

i want you, today, and after that

Nearly everything reminds of you somehow. And as soon as i remember something you've done or said it makes me happy and excited and i instantly feel the urge to retell the situation to whoever is with me, thinking that it may make them as happy as it makes me. I want you, all the time. Sometimes you make me angry. Upset. But then, before i even have time to be mad at you, you flash me one of your amazing smiles, or take me by surprise by saying something that i find even cuter than the last amazingly cute thing that made me feel that funny feeling in my stomach. You have me so consumed in you, more than you probably think. And when you talk about not wanting to lose me, i smile, thinking of how i fear losing you any time soon.

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

yeh brotha

i lyk house sittin'
it is siq

Tuesday, July 7, 2009

ignorance truely is bliss

the amount of times that i want to explore someone's mind, to know more and more about them. even a single opinion, a single detail of them, only to be disappointed, wishing that i didn't know any better and was back in my previous state of bliss.
the vicious cycle is tiring me.

Sunday, July 5, 2009

RE:

I can't believe the obesession my mind has been occupied with lately.
Finding a friend that is almost exactly like me. Sure, i have my friends, and i have my best friends (who are all amazing), but i honestly long for a friend that is insanely alike to me. Not necessarily physically, but just with similar views/morals/thoughts etcetera. The possibility of having someone that i can say anything to, and be certain that i won't be judged, won't feel a tinge of embarrassment, and feel as comfortable with them, as i do with myself is very appealing to me.
I want this friendship. Come and find me.